I am impatiently awaiting the arrival of my new yarn swift, and because the Royal Mail, which recently BOASTED of a 80% customer satisfaction rate (Only 20% of our customers want us to eat shit and die! We so rule!), has fucked me over twice this year by losing packages, the fact that it didn't arrive today, when all other things being equal, first class post should arrive the day after being sent, is making me nervous. And that 80% might sound OK, if, you know, everybody weren't totally dependent on them and their monopoly. But no! We are. And I proudly count myself in that 20% of their customers who poisonously hate them. Or maybe it's just because we're less than two weeks away from Christmas and they're really busy, I dunno. They have accrued no goodwill with me this year, so I am assuming the worst. They never even bothered to reply to my many, many complaints, either, the bastards.
And the worst part is that I got one of the last two swifts the place I ordered it from will have until after Christmas, so if it's lost or stolen, I am just plain screwed. But! It could just be the time of year, oh please, oh please, I want this swift so badly, and I want it now, and also I want the other stuff that was in my order, because I truly do need two of those balls of yarn like yesterday, so I can finish off a scarf I'm currently making. Which I then have to entrust to the...Royal Mail. See? They've got me coming and going, and I swear to god, I take back every mean thing I ever said about the USPS, because they never dicked me like this. They dicked me in tiny little ways that never included losing my packages twice in a two-month period. I can live with a lesser dicking, really. (Please, please give me my swift, Royal Mail!)
I will not feel silly for expressing my hatred and angst either, even if it does show up tomorrow (please oh please), because they do suck. They'll just suck slightly less if I get my package tomorrow.
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